If your thoughts are spiralling in the void of uncertainty and negativity, you can end up feeling stressed and drained.

For example, if you excessively overthink when trying to make a decision, you can end up feeling anxious. And the same thing can happen if you are dwelling on the past, worrying about the future, or ruminating about negative emotions.

The mind wants certainty — it wants solutions, realisations, conclusions, answers and action plans. Therefore, any time your mind becomes stuck in uncertainty or negativity, you will feel uneasy.

You have to recognise that your thinking processes can have a direct influence on what unfolds in your life.

The Vicious Spiral of Overthinking

• If you overly focus your thoughts on what you don’t like and what you don’t want, this will drain you because you are signalling to yourself that you have made wrong decisions and that you are in trouble.
• And if you then dwell in uncertainty and negativity, and take no action to help yourself, this will drain you further because you are signalling to yourself that you are powerless and helpless.
• And then, if you beat yourself up through self-criticism and self-depreciation, this will drain you even further because you are signalling to yourself that you don’t accept or care about yourself.

How to Stop Overthinking

If ever you’re in some sort of dilemma, or you feel stuck in unhelpful thoughts, your best option is to calm yourself and relax.

When you are calm, you will have access to more advanced forms of cognition — you will be able to think clearly and rationally. You will be less cluttered by emotions and more in tune with your instincts and intuition.

Once you are calm, write down the thoughts you were overthinking about. This will help you to feel more composed and in control.

• If you’ve been overthinking the past and dwelling on mistakes, you can help yourself via a process of self-acceptance.
• If you’ve been overthinking due to indignation or resentment, you can make an effort to free yourself from grievances.
• If you’ve been overthinking due to concerns you have about your life, you can move forward by overcoming your worries.
• If you’ve been overthinking due to indecision, you can help yourself by being more decisive.

Distressful overthinking is almost always caused by some form of discontentment.

And there are times in life when it’s best to loosen the grip of your desires and expectations. By letting go of your ambitions for a little while, you can often avert the spiral of overthinking.

Some disappointment and uncertainty in life is inevitable. And it’s almost always best to be patient and to maintain your composure. In the vast majority of circumstances, there is no need to overthink and no need to rush.

You can train yourself to slow your thoughts by being less reactive. You achieve this by observing your thoughts without forming judgements or opinions. And then you can avoid the chain reaction of overthinking, where thoughts bounce from one to the next and can spiral out of control.

Breathe slowly and calmly, bringing your awareness to your body, noticing where you are, what you can sense, what you can hear, what you can feel. And then observe any thoughts that arise — but don’t chase them or react to them, just quietly observe.

I recommend a daily meditation practise to help you accomplish this. Over time, you will be able to readily bring yourself into a calm state of awareness. And this will allow you to more easily access clarity and intuition.

To deal with the challenges of life, you have to use your mind strategically. You have to recognise when to think critically, and then you also have to recognise when to step back and relax. By maintaining a healthy balance, you are able to avoid overthinking.